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Filtering by Category: Reflections

Within the Blue Above

Gavin Lee

A meditation while swimming backstroke and watching the blue above. Sometimes, on a lucky day, we see hawks and other birds flying overhead. In years past during the spring and early summer, we would often see Cooper’s hawks nesting near the pool, raising their chicks and teaching them the ways of the world.

Our friend Emery would share this love of birds with us as he sat in the lifeguard chair. We enjoyed seeing the various hawks and pointing them out to each other. Emery had an affection for crows. When he was in his youth, he befriended a crow and it would follow him to school and back home, often flying by his classroom window.

When we see the hawks and crows at the pool, we watch in amazement and think of our dear friend Emery.

Redtail and Crows.jpg

36 Views of Alcatraz

the first hour of sunrise as seen from the hills of El Cerrito

We’ve posted this on the morning when Emery would have been apart of the “Indigenous People Sunrise Ceremony” on Alcatraz Island. In the past it was the “Unthanksgiving Day” to commemorate the protest event of 1969 where the Alcatraz-Red Power Movement (ARPM) occupied the Island for 19 months. Emery was part Cherokee, taking part in this ceremony every year. He had many stories of his times spent there and with the elders. To many of us in our local swim community, he was our elder. ✌️

Taking Stock

Gavin Lee

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We’ve been able to swim regularly for the last few weeks. It’s a blessing with mixed feelings. I do need swimming for health and fitness, but the benefits towards mental health outweigh the physical benefits. Knowing this I try to keep a positive attitude with our new culture of swim reservations and the limited access that it entails. Mostly, we are grateful to be able to swim and to have reconnected with a swim community that we have been absent from for too long.

Over the last few weeks, I’ve managed a few short workout sets, a lot of drills and easy swimming, and a few short swim tests just to see where I’m at. I’m getting a better feel for the water and inching closer to where I once was. I’m not sure how long we’ll be able to sustain this under current circumstances. So, we’re trying to take it one day at a time.


Today I did some freestyle pulling with fins as a combination of easy swim, scull and a fast 50. I like pulling with fins because it does not provide the buoyancy of a pull buoy. This requires you to engage your core for better balance and rotation. I also kick off the walls, working on streamline and building up the kick. As soon as I breakout and start a stroke, I stop the kick and focus on the pull. Pulling with fins is also a lot of fun and a way to get the feeling of fast swimming! The fast ones were within 1 sec of where I once was… so, not too bad for a few weeks of work.


I just recently started to work in a few drills and very short swims with fins. This is a great way to ease into the rhythm of the stroke. One of the drills we call “Stone-skipper”. It’s a way to break up the stroke into two parts… the recovery phase and the pull phase with a long gentle glide in-between. It’s great for rhythm and timing. I also did a dolphin kick breaststroke. This also helps with the rhythm and timing of both breaststroke and fly.


A 50 yard sprint kick with fins is another thing I like to do to gauge where I am at. I was surprise to find that I’m within a second of my best time here as well… very happy with that! 💪🏽


Then & Now

Gavin Lee

A throwback to what I could once do. After 7 months without a pool, I’m grateful for any opportunity to swim these days.

But what will our future have in store for us?  Unfortunately, it feels like swimming is becoming an activity for the privileged.  Due to the current need to book reservations for a 45 minute swim in a lane to yourself, pool reservations become 90% filled within the first 10 minutes of booking.  It’s a “Feeding Frenzy “, competing for lanes with our friends and local community, leaving many out of the water.  To top it off, prices have doubled, some paying up to $12 for the 45 minutes. 

This does not make me feel good.  How can swimming be safely done for all?  

At this point I am learning how to let go of past goals in swimming… taking it one day at a time… maybe a little swim test now and then to see where I’m at… just for kicks… 😉

@2swim_ | FINIS Ambassadors

A Moving Meditation

Gavin Lee

Water is my element.  This is where I’m at home, where troubles fade and the day begins anew.  It doesn’t matter who’s around or how many people are in the lane, as soon as I enter the pool it’s just me, the water and that little black line.  Following that black line back and forth becomes a meditation.  Just like any other kind of mindfulness, there are certain things to watch and notice: how my hand is entering the water, the feel of the water pressure against the soles of my feet or against my forearms, the sound of my breath through a snorkel or the different shade of blue that the water happens to be at that moment.  In swimming I am practicing a form of moving meditation. Whether it’s slow and easy or hard and fast, there is always something to observe and to loose oneself to.

All Hallows’ Eve

Gavin Lee

Riding to the pool, I look over my shoulder, peering at the setting blue moon.  It’s pitch black out, not a soul around. Everything is quiet. We pass by friends’ homes with dark windows. And then several blocks later, two bright rectangles of light appear, flung out and stretched on the lawn of one house. 

On deck, orange moonlight glows between silhouetted trees. The pool seems to hover in the darkness. I suddenly remember: it’s Halloween. The mood is subdued perhaps because it’s still quite early, so dark I could swear it was the middle of the night. No one says a word. It feels as though we’re all in our own worlds. Bodies appear more vulnerable, shadows against the illuminated pool. Clothes are shed and there’s something almost ceremonial about it. It’s a cold morning, hard to be nearly naked. Shivering, I take a step and jump in, thrilled that the water’s a great temperature. I’m awake instantly, a sharpness takes hold of me when seconds ago I was still drifting elsewhere. The sky very gradually lightens as if it’s opening. Coming up for air, through the sound of splashing water, I catch fragments of the dawn chorus.

Later I remember the Celtic origins of Halloween, the belief that it was a time when boundaries between worlds of the living and the dead thinned, blurred and spirits could pass easily into ours.  In the water, other boundaries for me are blurred between dreaming and waking. 

… L

Above, Below, Beyond

Gavin Lee

After many years of swimming indoors, it’s been an experience going back to the outdoor pool where we used to swim. The light is dazzling, colors are bright and vivid, the air so fresh, a flood of sensations. It makes me a little dizzy, trying to take everything in all at once. I love seeing blue above, below, all around. Watching white clouds drifting as I’m doing backstroke is like being in a dream. And then there are the birds. One day we witness an aerial battle: a murder of crows dive bombing a Cooper’s hawk. Another morning we arrive, greeted by the familiar high pitched, soft, sweet whistling calls of cedar waxwings. They’re perched high in a tree, all facing the same direction, taking turns darting into a red berry bush to feed. As they fly away they make a pattern of dark little crosses scattering into the blue sky. 

… L

Thank you to Luke, Jeannie and Sue for today:)

 

A Blast from the Past

Gavin Lee

I came across this video that Lauri took of me many years ago  What’s most moving is not the image but the voice in the background… that distinctive voice from the past, the voice of love, the long missed voice and laughter of Emery.  We miss you dearly and think of you all the time.  Yes Emery, we will see you later!  ✌️

💞L&G

ps. I found this video on the morning of Monday October 19th... it just so happens to be Emery's Birthday... Happy Birthday Brother! It was also recorded on Lauri's Birthday in 2011. It's a strange thing when these stars are aligned!

@2swim_ | FINIS Ambassadors

The Color of Water

Gavin Lee

Robin’s Eggshell

Robin’s Eggshell

Photograph By Anna Atkins

Photograph By

Anna Atkins

After so much time away from daily swimming, it’s breathtaking catching my first glimpse of the water. That dazzling blue. Cyan. I get a hit of both calm and excitement. I can’t wait to jump in! During the seven months without a pool I saw this color only twice. One morning on a hike, that familiar, long absent color suddenly appears between leaves and branches: a pool!  Another time, it shows up again in an American Robin’s egg shell. The color is named Robin egg blue, eggshell blue or lost egg blue.  I had no idea until then that I’d feel deprived not only of swimming but also of the sight of this very special blue.

Today I learn that this same shade of blue is called haint blue in the American south, made from crushed indigo and traditionally painted on porch ceilings in slave quarters to ward away haints, or ghosts. The color mimicked the sky, tricking the ghost into passing through, or mimicked the appearance of water, which ghosts could not cross. 

I’ve always loved this color, introduced to cyanotypes through the work of Anna Atkins, who is recognized as the first woman to create a photograph. And as a child, I was surrounded by that blue, watching my father create blueprints of his architectural drawings. 

It’s one thing to see this color and yet how much more thrilling to also be immersed in it. 

Thank you to our friends Phyllis and Lee who generously offered his lane to me this morning!

… L